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He knew it was just a case of being frightened of his own mortality. Maybe a bullet behind the ear or a quick shove off a railway platform was a better way to go. The choices were not very appealing in either direction.Oscar didn't recognize him.He thought Harry was the police come to arrest him for some long forgotten transgression. He backed out of the room with regret and said his good nights to Bojana. He pitied her long term depressing future looking after the befuddled old man.Olga was snoring when he got back to the room. It was a little warm and she had thrown off the blanket exposing her short night shirt and skimpy panties. He looked at her soft skin and slender thighs. Harry thought he must be getting very old because nothing was stirring down there. Maybe it was the sight of poor Oscar and his realization he was probably only a year or two younger than him.He dismantled the little gun. Harry had discarded the heavy .45 caliber automatic years ago in favor of the tiny .22. I became aware of smells then. I could smell a hint of several perfumes mixed with the smell of fresh brewing coffee. I could smell chemicals so different than the others. I started to feel again, my physical body slowly joining my mind. I could feel the hands I was holding with my own. I slowly began to refocus on my surroundings. I focused from the seemingly bejeweled nails, to the hands, and then to the person.She was smiling down at me with a knowing look. I desperately needed that look! Knowing! I had to know! All my questions streamed to the surface at light speed. It was as if they knew on their own that the answers would be found! I once again rejoined the here and now. I looked around me and smiled. I WOULD KNOW! All I had to do was ask. Not an easy thing to do at this moment though.I first would have to organize the zillion questions screaming to be asked all at one time. I needed some order! I needed to ask the questions in such a way as to answer many by asking only a.
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